You keep what you kill

Aussie humor, more Aussie humor, giant supermuffin, best supermuesli in the world.

The last four days of our trip offered quite a lot of variety. Mt Field was pretty, although the weather prevented us from hiking the alpine trails, but the waterfalls and forest further down was a good alternative. Also, quite to our surprise, the food at the National Park Hotel was decent. It was pub food, lots of fries with everything, but honest and at pub food prices. No rip off, no wine list, no table-fucking-cloth. ☺ Unfortunately, the same cannot be said for our accommodation in Maydena, Giants table cottages. Not so great, if the Hitler rating system was still in place, they would have scored way low... Anyway, we spent our last two days in Cygnet and stayed at a fantastic B&B, Cygnet's Secret Garden. Wonderful, great breakfast with homemade yogurt and jams. Also not too far from the Hartz mountain national park, named after Peter Hartz. This was a decent place for 'last hike before flying home', nice lakes along the way, and a priest with a minivan full of nu...

We got lucky with the weather, again. After a nice leg stretcher halfway round the lake we took advantage of the brilliant weather and did the Mt Rufus Circuit the next day. What can I say, best hike of this trip! Not particularly exhausting, but wonderful views to all sides and great stretches of wildflowers in full bloom. Magnificent! We also crossed a boggy section and I finally got baptized in Tasmanian mud for good, up to the hip. 😁 I looked like some monster character out of a shitty video game. But mud bathing is healthy, or so they say, so good onion. We tried dinner at the hotel at derwent bridge, the food was OK, but too expensive - except for the dessert, that was top notch! On the road to Lake St Clair and from thereon towards Hobart we also saw an increasing number of 'plague vehicles', id est campervans. I'm pretty sure I've mentioned before that I despise campervans, but I can't repeat it often enough: I fucking hate campervans. They sho...

Corinna is in the middle of nowhere, in the heart of the Tarkine, an area full of beautiful temperate rainforest, rivers, and wild wild coastline. Corinna used to be a logging town, and has now been converted into a low key eco wilderness thing. We had a fantastic cabin, superclean, superspacious, with windows right on the edge of the forest. And we chose to spend a couple of days in the area. No cell reception, no TV, no Internet. ☺ Just wonderful hikes to enjoy, for example up to and along the Savage River (which is really peaceful) and then up to Mt Donaldson, or along the Whyte River. We also cruised the Pieman River down to the Pieman Heads and scrambled along the dunes and coast, enjoying the angry sea battering against the rocks. Dinner at the local hotel wasn't much to write home about, pretty bland, and the Reisebegleitung's salmon had spent a bit too much time under the heat. If they'd used that time to remove the fishbones instead, that would have been appreciate...

One thing I found rather disappointing was the food in Tassie. All the advertisements and the big words, but at the end of the day you get chips and wedges as a vegetarian. Seafood is usually top notch everywhere, meat already more problematic because a lot of the chefs apparently lack the skills to prepare it properly. There are exceptions of course, we found some true gems, but overall I'd expected more, especially given the hype that's drummed up by the marketing folks. Also, what struck me, is that a lot of restaurants are trying to punch above their weight (and losing). Quite often you get fancy sounding names on menus, high prices, but only run of the mill pub food at the end. There's nothing wrong with pubfood, but it's not ok to charge the same as a fine dining establishment just because you're using tablecloths... We had some really nice pub and cafe meals, but we also had some disappointing experiences. Hobart especially is more talk than rock. But who ca...

I just found out, after all these years, that the Reisebegleitung favors Sylvester, not Tweety. What the fuck? The bloody cat? Das ist ein charakterlichischer Abgrund. Ich weiß noch nicht, wie ich damit umgehen werde. Und was Kylie dazu sagt?

I've shed some light on gay living in Oz in my posts from our QLD and NT trip in 2015 already. But here in Tassie they're taking it to a whole new level. And I'm glad to see that the society has evolved and progressed so far! The latest thing in the Tassie gay community are so called grooming parties. Sounds harmless, but, oh boy, I tell ya, even hardened (no pun intended) Reizbar visitors would blanche. What happens is this: some guys set the time and location and word is spread via the usual hangouts: garages, fuel stations, outdoor and hunting shops, grindr (look for Gaytime Bartbruder Tassie). When the time comes, a bunch of manly blokes drive to a remote campsite in the woods in their 4x4s. One of then will have an Esky full of Gaytime ice cream. (and yes, the flavor sets the scene for what happens after, but I'm not at liberty to go into details here - what happens in Tassie, stays in Tassie) Everybody will enjoy their ice cream, afterwards they will start groomin...

Corinna "ferry" ☺, flowers, lake, and more flowers the latter three all at Lake St Clair National Park

In order: Russell falls in Mt Field National Park, the bestest cream tea in Tassie, wildflowers on Mt Rufus, Australian ice cream, I wonder whether there's Gaytime Barramundi flavor?

The weather still held the next day, so we decided to head for Cradle Mountain Peak, taking the Overland Track route from Ronny Creek, via Marion's Lookout, and then circled back via Face Track, Lake Wilks Track, and Dove Lake track. Not a cloud in the sky, brilliant weather, and no wind either. This is like winning the lottery up there and it's beautiful terrain. Wonderful scenery, fantastic views of lakes, rugged peaks and two nice uphill climbs. The first one, to Marion's Lookout, is steep but very short, so not too hard. Climbing up to the peak itself is a different story, looks rather easy from Kitchen Hut, but it's a real scramble over boulder fields, using your hands, carefully picking a route. Great fun! You shouldn't be afraid of heights though. 😁 At the top you're rewarded with superfantastic views, feels like being on top of the world! ☺ 😊 Just don't try it when it's wet and windy ... . The next day, the weather still ...

On our way south we passed thru Sheffield and discovered another little gem, a Fruit and Veges shop tucked away in a side alley next to the gas station, kinda opposite the tourist information and the IGA. This shop has great produce and does real fruit ice cream, what more could you wish for? ☺ 🍦 Apart from that, not much to see until we reached the caves. Unfortunately they're only accessible by guided tour but 19 AUD per person per cave seemed a bit too much for our feeling so we skipped and opted instead for a walk to some falls ca 12km south of Mole Creek. It was the right decision, nice forest and beautiful falls, noone else around. Mole Creek itself is dying, that's clear to see. We stayed at the Mole Creek Guest House, which is nice enough, but something was lacking. Heart, love, I dunno, sth like that. The breakfast was an insult, a long table full of plastic crap, and the toast was still in the packaging. I mean, they sure mean well, but to me it's li...

It's telling how I keep losing interest in football over the years. I guess I'm also not the target audience any more, which seems to be middle class families willing to spend thousands of euros each year. To keep the coffers of the greedy bastards filled. I'm also unwilling to give up my personal freedom to some random half-baked security guys who don't know shit anyway. To stand in line and follow stupid procedures for nothing. Just to make them feel better. And then to see all these highly optimized machines play each other. It's progress, yes, but it's not fascinating anymore. Because with very few exceptions, you might as well watch the track and field competitions. But what bothers me most is all the complaining and whinging. Fucking stop it. Take a look at rugby and grow the fuck up. The quality of the referees doesn't help, of course, because they suck and they're fucking arrogant guys on a power trip. Werder is, again, for the umpteenth time, t...

We decided to take a little detour on purpose and take the southern route because that provided an excuse to stop by the beloved Eureka Farm again. Soooo delicious, again and again. I'm still heartbroken that I probably won't be going there ever again. 😔 We also made another pitstop at St Mary's and then set off towards the West. I wanted to see Mathinna Falls but the gravel road got worse and worse and I had to turn back a couple of hundred meters before our goal, I didn't want to risk killing the 2WD car... On the way North we stopped at the Christmas Hills raspberry farm, which is gigantic and so unlike Eureka. Nice, but not super exciting, unfortunately. The raspberry fizz was nice though. We reached Tranquilles B&B very early afternoon, it's a beautiful thing, very friendly hosts, very comfortable rooms. And super protruding bed posts, my shin now has another scar because I kept hitting the fucking thing whenever walking past. The second B her...

Still enthused by the culinary delights consumed at Eureka, we drove down to Binalong Bay. What a nice place. This is certainly one of the absolute highlights of our trip. Fantastic apartment (thru Air Bob  again, I mean AirBnB but since autocorrection insists on either Air Bob wtf? Or Airbus we'll use Air Bob henceforth), great views over the bay from both verandah and bedroom, induction cooktop, lots of space, superclean, supercomfortable, supernice. Bay of Fires is simply amazing, great beaches, fantastic coastline, red (lichen covered) rocks, lots of wildlife. Especially tons of kookaburras and I fell in love with their laughs, so to speak. I even downloaded 15 different sound files to use on my phone, the Reisebegleitung loves it already. 😉 Nice hiking all around as well, Eureka Farm within driving distance, what more could you wish for? Wish we could've stayed longer, but that's another downside of Tasmania - no accommodation allows for cancellation, so yo...

I just found out that Tasmanians are just as dishonorable as Canadians. There are certain activities and consequently certain parts of the body that should not be bitten. But apparently these fellas don't adhere to the unwritten codex. Fuck you, I've had enough. I will kill every single mosquito. We Germans suck at almost everything, but if there's one thing we're good at, it's genocide. Prepare to be exterminated. Except the one that bit me in the arse, this one I will capture and torture slowly . Very slowly. You will suffer to the end of days. Die, motherfucker, die.

That title should get me pics some traffic. 😁 In order: very rare, endemic Tasmanian gumboot tree, sign, motivational sign, breakfast for Champions 😍 💕 💞 🍓 🍒🍑🌞

Perhaps it's time to make it clear that I really despise AirBnB. It's a tax dodging scheme that gives 'landlords' an unfair advantage by allowing them to ignore regulations that 'official' businesses have to adhere to. Alas, it is impossible to find accommodation outside this scheme in some areas, so I have to use it sometimes. And the experiences have been mostly fine so far, the same in Australia. With one big difference, here it is totally impersonal, you don't meet the hosts because apparently all the juicy real estate has been gobbled up by mainlanders and they now rent it out to tourists. Sounds like some parts of Berlin, right? And I'm pretty sure this will come back to bite them, because it aids in transferring even more wealth to outside of the community. So much for that. I made a shocking discovery the other day. The Reisebegleitung doesn't know Monty Python's Spanish Inquisition sketch. I'm lost for words. Growing up in the GDR i...

There's not a lot of accommodation around Freycinet NP, some boring luxury lodges and the rest is mainly through AirBnB. Which I don't like but beggars can't be choosers so, after avoiding a rip off attempt by one strange person to upsell I found us a nice place in Swannick. Spacious, clean, comfortable. The problem with Tasmania is that you have to pre book all accommodation between Xmas and end of January, so not much room for improvisation unfortunately, unless you want to throw money away. Because they have zero tolerance cancellation policies, all of them. Which doesn't make the place to appealing to me, I must say. And I also don't think that it will be economically healthy and sustainable if mainland Aussies buy up the juicy real estate and then rent it out via tax dodging platforms like AirBnB. But who am I. Freycinet NP is beautiful, no doubt. We took a walk along the aptly named Friendly Beaches, the first time the tanmaster showed his exquisite body to t...

The Tasman Peninsula is a beautiful place, lots of dramatic coastline and stuff. We hiked up to Cape Raoul, fantastic dolerite cliffs with the sea banging against them all the way. This was the first time we came up against the grading system, again. I think I've elaborated on that enough in previous years, but I still think it's dangerous the way they do it: basically every step you take outside your own garden is already grade 3 if it's not wheelchair accessible. And this leaves one with absolutely no feeling for how difficult the really difficult ones are in the end. Because Cape Raoul is more like a walk in a (hilly) park. Certainly not as hardcore as they make it sound in their description. Well, enough said. We stayed at Abs by the bay, a very nice motel, right on the bay, who would've thought. Good towels, too. 😁 the next two days saw rain, but lucky for us, there was a small strip along the coast line where the sky was blue, all the clouds pressing a...

So, we obviously started in Hobart. We stayed at a small accommodation just out of town, on Mt Nelson, beautiful views over the bay, very quiet and two lovely dogs. It's called Signalman's Cottage and I won't call it a B&B because the B for breakfast, well, I'll get back to that in a later post. Suffice to say that so far the breakfasts have been rather disappointing. Especially if you look at the prices. But hey, apart from that, everything was fine. Hobart itself is nice, but really overhyped and a lot of the eateries in town are overpriced and overrated. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but it's what it is. A lot of places were also closed between Xmas and new year, so getting a table at the few cafes that were open was more or less impossible. But there are exceptions and one of them must be raved about and praised: All Thai. We went to both outlets and both times it was a fantastic dinner, best Thai food I've had outside of Asia! Wonderful! We also tried Bu...

Spiked anal plug plant, Nice beach, nice beach, new year's eve dinner view ☺

Best tearoom, best food and I want to be adopted by these people please, bad bad tyre...

In order: Christmas elves on Qantas, room with a view and a dog, funny carousel for cartman's imaginary friends, and honest sign in the best ice cream cart in Tassie! 😍

The flight from HND to HBA was pleasant, although it was a really ancient 747-400. Business class was just as ancient, but still lie flat (very slight angle only) and that's what's counts. The Qantas staff was super nice, attentive, and friendly, food was good and plentiful. And they had the entire sixth season of Game of Thrones. ☺ Immigration in SYD was a breeze, no waiting time at all, luggage arrived first, and the next two hops to MEL and then Hobart went flawless. Hobart Airport is a shed in the middle of nowhere, but who gives a shit? We got there at ca half past three in the afternoon, picked up our car and drove the 25mins across town to our accommodation, the Signalman's Cottage on Mt Nelson. Beautiful sunshine, nice views of the bay, couldn't have been better. This was the first time I rented with one of the big companies, europcar to be precise, because none the smaller ones had strange or intransparent T&Cs. Turns out, the quality you get from europca...

Not quite finished with Japan yet. I was really surprised how easy it is to get around these days. When I was there for the first time, many many years ago, there were no English signs, Western credit cards weren't accepted and the ticket machines didn't speak English either. These days, it's almost disappointingly simple. No need to compare Kanji characters any more! The Zen Cafe I mentioned in my earlier post is this one (since there are several by that name): 〒605-0074 Kyōto-fu, Kyōto-shi, Higashiyama-ku, Gionmachi Minamigawa, 東山区祇園町南側５７０ The Ramen place might be called "なにわらーめん金久右衛門 京都祗園店" and is just around the corner from the cafe at: 〒605-0933 Kyōto-fu, Kyōto-shi, 東山区Yamatochō, 大和大路通四...

Kyoto was kind of cute. I mean, obviously a tourist destination both for foreigners and natives, but still a nice place to visit. Plus they have a fantastic International Manga Museum 😁. We spent Christmas there as did lots of Japanese as well, apparently one of the Christmas traditions is to take your partner out on a romantic date. A nice tradition methinks without all the garbage from the West. I tried very hard to get the Reisebegleitung to wear a Kimono for me but she steadfastly refused. Women. ☺ We still had a great time, some very old temples with wonderful gardens and of course the old imperial palace including the palace grounds. The sunny weather held, there were approximately 500 gazillion kinds of moss and a couple of red and ochre maple trees providing a nice backdrop for all the old stuff. One of the most endearing things about Kyoto is the fact that it's a lot easier to find good vegetarian food. We ate a lot of stuff that we didn't recognize but whi...